0 Registered (),
63
Guests and
0
Spiders online. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
3239 Members
63 Forums
16332 Topics
210704 Posts
Max Online: 409 @ 01/17/20 03:33 AM
|
|
|
#129534 - 10/17/07 11:52 AM
Getting Married in our 50's or later......
|
Registered: 08/22/07
Posts: 1761
Loc: Southern Maine, USA
|
I just had to start this thread because in some of the others, it naturally leads to discussions (at the end) of the joys and tribulations of later in life newlyweds. I'd love to hear others thoughts on what it was/is like and how they keep it going! In some ways I've found it to be easier and yet in my situation the first couple of years was no easier than when I was in my twenties...so many different issues. We were married 3 years ago when I was 50 and he was 55, second marriages for both of us. How did you meet? What were some of the obstacles in the beginning and/or what have they become with time? How do you cope or deal with them?
_________________________
If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane ~ Jimmy Buffett
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#129535 - 10/17/07 05:42 PM
Re: Getting Married in our 50's or later......
[Re: ladyjane]
|
Queen of Shoes
Registered: 05/24/04
Posts: 6123
Loc: Arizona
|
It's easier now because I know I will never marry again (even if he passes away) and there isn't that ego to jump in and threaten to leave if there is a big argument. I guess I've grown up.
We met at a restaurant while both waiting for a table. Only obstacle was stepchildren. When I stopped competiting, the competition stopped too.
_________________________
If it doesn't feel good, don't do it twice. www.eadv.netBoomer Queen of Shoes
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#129536 - 10/18/07 12:04 AM
Re: Getting Married in our 50's or later......
[Re: Dianne]
|
Member
Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 789
Loc: Aptos, California
|
We met on the internet. I had a problem child who stole 300+ CDs from him (they were being stored in the garage), broke the antenna from his car and generally raised havoc. Ken still stayed. I was hooked.
It gets easier because we have both matured enough to keep the focus on ourselves, not have the other person meet all our needs and keep growing.
It also helps, as my girlfriend said, that I finally got it right. :-))
_________________________
Casey Dawes Wise Woman Shining Supporting women business owners to step into their power as business leaders.
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#129537 - 10/18/07 11:13 AM
Re: Getting Married in our 50's or later......
[Re: Casey]
|
Registered: 08/22/07
Posts: 1761
Loc: Southern Maine, USA
|
Casey, Your statement "It gets easier because we have both matured enough to keep the focus on ourselves, not have the other person meet all our needs and keep growing" is so true! When we're younger we seem to think that this new person needs to meet ALL of our emotional and other needs rather than realizing that we're responsible for ourselves! Good point. I, too, met my husband on the internet....Match.com. He found me. We emailed for about a week and then met at a bluesy nightclub where he played with the band.
_________________________
If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane ~ Jimmy Buffett
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#129539 - 10/19/07 03:38 PM
Re: Getting Married in our 50's or later......
|
Registered: 08/22/07
Posts: 1761
Loc: Southern Maine, USA
|
Honestly, I think I have to agree about young people and internet dating. I'm not sure how I'd handle it if I had teens of 20-something single kids. I fear for them, not through their own fault, but because of who they are at the age....we've all been there....some of us smarter and wiser than others! I think it would open up the world a bit much. Kids are just naturally braver than more cautious older adults about most things. There are strange people out there. I still found that to be true when I was internet dating. I corresponded awhile and if I felt it was worth a meeting, it was always in a public place with my own car. We hear from the news how kids are so trusting in giving out names and addresses and other particulars online. If one is very cautious and takes their time (and follows their gut)it can be an okay method of meeting people you would otherwise never have a chance to (no matter what age), but my own children? I think I'd be passing out the warnings, too. I met a few weirdos.
_________________________
If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane ~ Jimmy Buffett
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#129540 - 10/19/07 04:15 PM
Re: Getting Married in our 50's or later......
[Re: ladyjane]
|
Registered: 10/14/07
Posts: 139
Loc: The wilds of Scotland, UK
|
Internet dating? Hmmm...I would have been too afraid I think! My daughter has a friend she met online and I was SO afraid that this so-called teenage girl was actually some horrible dirty old paedo out to get her!! It took a long time (and a webcam) to convince me she was just a regular girl!! LOL
_________________________
Strangers are just friends waiting to happen.
|
Top
|
|
|
|
#129542 - 10/23/07 12:12 AM
Re: Getting Married in our 50's or later......
|
Member
Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 789
Loc: Aptos, California
|
I think our kids are much more comfortable with the internet than we are. However, I agree that they don't necessarily have the sense they need. So, it's really important that they get the message over and over to be careful, always meet in a public place, etc.
_________________________
Casey Dawes Wise Woman Shining Supporting women business owners to step into their power as business leaders.
|
Top
|
|
|
|
|