What strength and honesty you have, Searcher. And Nichole obviously took after you, to be spunky and so attuned to life and the importance of living for the moment, even while she was suffering in unimaginable ways. It's so rare to find mother/daughter relationships like yours. There was no time for much 'fluff' in your relationship - the two of you got to know each other and appreciate each other deeply. As you know, nothing tangible lasts forever, but the connection the two of you have (yes, have, not had) is forever and you have so many positives to remember - not a collection of regrets. A sad but very beautiful story.

I have no doubts that wonderful things await you and your future will be filled with unexpected joy and contentment. And Nichole will be smiling down on you all the while.