mammajude, I too am married to someone w/ manic-depressive illness as we prefer to call it. For some reason "bi-polar" sounds worse to him. At any rate, we've been together for 17 years and last year was the first time that we had a significant issue and that the diagnosis was manic psychosis. I went through 9 months of terror and hell before all was said and done and then another six months while we experimented w/ meds for the depression that often follows mania.
The book "An Unquiet Mind" by Dr. Kay Redfield Jamison is the best I've ever read not neccessarily from a clinical perspective but from a personal one...she is a bi-polar doctor of psychiatry. And for the boomer lady out there who wonders how you know....I agree, there is no mistaking the real deal when it comes to a bad episode. In our case my husband had probably been having hypo manics (sort of little manics) and depressions for years but they never really interfered with his life. I have to say that I really respect him for suffering what he knew in his heart were bi-polar symptoms for years and never letting it hurt me or the children. His father and brother, an uncle and cousin...all bi-polar, so i know he suspected. It's been a long, painful time and we both accept that this is something that we'll have to be watchful of....but by the grace of God and the power of a good woman's love (me....I can barely manage to give myself a pat on the back occassionally) we are on the mend. And I concur w/ Dots....Julie Fast has a wonderful site and some great ideas for managing life w/ the disorder. God Bless!!!
kathryn