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#70870 - 08/27/04 01:28 AM
Re: young children/older children
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Founder
Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
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Well, since I've been bamboozled into this situation and am living it now, I can honestly say it's easier with the younger child.
The children of my son's former girlfriend, which has two children, ages 5 and 1, and is pregnant with his child (maybe), if I had to deal with either, I'd choose the 1 year old. I know that the one year old has pamper changing, bottling, pottie training, the works but it would be easier than dealing with a child that has already been molded into an unruly person due to lack of parenting and worse.
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#70871 - 08/27/04 03:01 AM
Re: young children/older children
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Member
Registered: 06/26/03
Posts: 621
Loc: pennsylvania
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The younger the better. My step daughter was 7. And already a little person who had to conform to her Mom's house and our house. Complicated from the start.
Lynn
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#70876 - 08/28/04 05:49 PM
Re: young children/older children
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Da Queen
Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 12025
Loc: Alabama
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Over compensation from a single parent, or one who has remarried is a very common problem. Unfortunately, sometimes it can lead to the child (especially one growing into the situation) expecting life/parent/step-parent to bend to their every whine...In their effort to do good, the enabling parent becomes just that, an enabler. Limits to their "making up for a bad parent" helpfullness are never set and another unfortunate thing is that the helping hand of the parent(s) seems to be driven by guilt. Guilt over not being able to hold the family together, not being able to be both a mother/father, or be there every single waking hour of their children's lives, or just guilt because they feel like they have failed everyone, including the spouse that left. WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!
Maybe...and I'm guessing here Dianne, so bear with me, but maybe your hubby is overcompensating because his job has so much pressure that he feels guilty for not being able to be there all the time and because she left??? Just a stab in the dark.
JJ
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