Maybe if your husband does the kids chores enough, he'll get tired and say something or do something to change it.

I learned to not bring up David's sons name. I don't talk about him, don't bring him up in conversation and just say, oh really? when he brings up what he's doing. I also learned to say something once about the things his son was doing that were wrong and never mention it again. I thought if I said it often enough, he'd get it but all it did was put him on the defensive. Everything is much more peaceful now in our marriage.