Anne, I can't speak for Dianne, so let's take a hypothetical situation. Let's take a 34 year old woman and work backwards in years. At the age of 24, she may have remembered the abuse, and even spoke about it. However, if the abuse was not talked about in long term therapy, then speaking about it to a parent or friend is a band aid, and not a cure. (there is no cure, but the abused can manage symptoms such as anger.) From 24 to 34, the barely acknowledged and insufficiently dealt with abuse festers psychologically and spiritually and even physically (via eating disorders, alcohol & drug abuse, suicide attempts.) Then, the anger becomes the issue, and not the abuse, because the abuse itself has been stifled, stuffed, & snuffed. I try to go to churches to do presentations on CSA. Most churches are not equipped to deal with this topic. Any good minister will refer the victim to therapy with a counselor who is specifically trained for CSA. Mustang, I will surely elaborate on CSA. I am so sorry to hear that you were molested. Being a victim colors everything in your life. Unfortunately, this is a victim-blaming society. Accountablity and responsibility should be on the abuser, and the covert accomplises, which includes people who did nothing to stop it. Many people will say they did not know. Maybe they didn't know, but how can children tell if 1) they do not have the vocabulary for telling 2) they have been threatened not to tell 3) they think they won't be believed. In all 3 of the above, the burden is on the victim! The abuser gets away with it. You are one step ahead in that you have acknowledged the devastation of abuse, whether or not the abuser takes responsiblity. I'd like to validate that anger is your right, although I am so sorry that you had to endure the molestation that caused anger. Oh, when I was 14, I declared that I would never have children. I did not know it then, but my subconscious was saying that I did not want to bring another child into a world where fathers and brothers (and uncles and babysitters) sexually abuse their children. Mustang, what else would you like me to elaborate on?