Updates

Hello everyone,, I know its been a while. I've been so busy lately. I think things have calmed down for a little while. My husband who suffers from Bipolar disorder is still experiencing sleep problems and depression. The Dr. has added "Abilify" to the mix of medications. So far there isn't much change that I can tell.
He was so frustrated yesterday when he went to talk to his psychologist and she wasn't there. They couldn't find his appt. Don't you love it?? Two steps forward then 4 steps backwards.. UGH>>> not good. I just pray he'll feel better soon. At least have some stability!! This illness really takes it out of him and me. I keep on doing what I need to do and keep encouraging him to do what he needs to do. Its hard!! thanks for your prayers and support..

Mammajude,
Getting out of that sense of unwellness and instability can be so arduous and frustrating, not only for your husband, but for you who has to suffer right alongside of him AND be strong enough to keep encouraging him and putting up with the instability in so many smaller but equally frustrating ways.

My heart goes out to you. As do my prayers that he will ease into a more persistently reliable stability and that YOU will feel the support and care of those around you (like us here) who are with you in prayer and spirit.

Mammajude,

Your husband is so Blessed. I say that because not everyone with Bipolar is living with a simpathetic and understanding spouse.

Having said all this, I strongly urge you take some time, even if it a little time, for yourself.

You are Gold dear lady and I salute you!

Cheers and Blessings,
Cathi

mammajude --

i think in order to work in the mental health field -- you MUST have a mental illness yourself

that's the only way things would be done with the PATIENT in mind instead of the careless "whatever" attitude that exists now

you and your husband are in my thoughts and prayers

Thanks for the update, Mamajude. I've been missing you.

mamma, I'm sure it's hard. And don't you wonder how some people can get the right mix of medicine and others can't? I'm praying for the right mix.

Have you done anything fun lately? Why not rent or go to a funny movie. Laughter is good for the soul.

Blessings all around...

[ July 01, 2005, 11:49 AM: Message edited by: Dotsie ]

Mammajude, I'm so sorry that your husband hasn't found the right combination of drug therapy for stability. It took me a while too, but the doctor and I hit on the right combination about a year into my therapy. I've heard that it can take years for some people. I hope that isn't the case for your husband.

You really should be commended for being as supportive and helpful as you are. I realize how difficult it can be for significant others who must stand helplessly by and watch their loved ones suffer. But, your husband must be so grateful for having you there. Your presence gives him strength.

Don't get discouraged. All will work out.

I didn't want to cover this thread so will just post here. I had told all of you about my sister's DIL and the mental problems she was having. Well, the latest is, my nephew came home from work and all of the clocks in the house were covered because she now has an issue with the number 11. And, to add to this, she's pregnant again.

Well after taking the Abilify for almost two weeks with no real results the Dr. changed him to Zyprexa. After one week he upped the dose. He sees the Dr.s this week. He is feeling very weak and groggy on this medication. We can't seem to find the right mix. UGH>> Not fun. He hasn't been able to work much lately. I feel so helpless. Pray we find the right medication combo and SOON>>> thanks for listening..

Mamajude,
I can see so much love for your husband in your posts. And I admire the patience with which you search for a solution to his problems. I wonder though if, like many of us, you are placing too much faith in the 'right combo' of drugs. Maybe problems that are not relieved by chemicals are spiritual in nature.
Maybe he needs to be needed. Maybe he would feel better if he simply went out and did something good for someone for no reason except for the joy of it. Maybe he could do something wonderful for you.

Or maybe he is and we just don't know. I will pray that both his mind and his spirit are healed and that you are tremendously blessed for your love and patience.
smile

Mamma, I admire your dedication. I wish your hubby could read your posts.

Dianne, oh my, a pregnancy? How many children do they have, and how old?

Mamma, As you and your husband have found, it is very difficult sometimes to find the right medication to treat bipolar illness. At least you both are continuing to work with his doctor to find the right combination. In my experience many don't (I'm a psychologist; in practice for 36 years). I hope there is also a bipolar support group for both of you through your health plan or in your community. That can be a life saver for both sufferer and spouse. Wishing you the best, Karen

Hello Doctor Karen, how nice to see a psychologist on the site! Thank you for jumping right in for Mamajude's situation. Would you like to go to the welcome forum to introduce yourself? Love and Light, Lynn

Dockaren, welcome and thanks for your advice. I also hope you'll run to the welcome forum and introduce yourself. We want to know more!

Mammajude -

My son did better on Zyprexa than any other meds they tried -- but it did make him sleepy -- is he taking it in the evening before bed? That helped Robert -- he slept better and wasn't as sleepy during the day.

You and hubby are in my thoughts !!

Thanks everyone for your support and caring.. I needed this today as I was feeling very bummed out this morning from all of this stuff. Hubby still doesn't have the energy to go to work. He takes the new meds at night but is still having the blahs in the day. His Dr.s are monitoring him. He sees his psychologist again tomorrow. I'm hoping talking about things will help him too.
We keep in prayer about it but have no answers. We are going to get away next week for a few days. He is going with me to a work meeting in Oakland. We'll have some free time to explore.
We keep on keeping on..

that's about all you can do -- keep on keeping on --

i hope your trip away helps a little bit -

we're here when you need us

Mamma, you and hubby are always in my prayers. Have a great getaway.
chick

Mamma, keep the faith. I'm praying your trip rejuvinates you!

Mammajude, I have to tell you this story. I always change stories enough so that no one can be identified (it's the story, not the person that is important). A lovely lady in one of my groups struggled with her husband not going to work (his own business). She would have to keep things afloat for him...since it was the major source of their family income. So, of course, this was very upsetting to her again and again. Finally the group helped her come up with a solution to make her feel better. Every time he refused to get up and go to work, her reward was a week's vacation off by herself or with a girlfriend. And she actually DID it. She also did what she had to to maintain the business. Pretty soon, even with severe mental illness, he "got" it. He didn't like her trotting off. So he began getting himself up come hell or high water. Now this solution might not work for everyone...but the idea is to reframe someone else's negative behavior as an incentive to do something nice for ourselves. Instead of "joining" him in his illness, he "joined" her in her wellness. You might even find a solution of your own along this line. I'll be thinking positive thoughts for you in your struggle. Doctor Karen

Dear Doctor Karen,

That is one of the most unique suggestions I have ever seen. I wish it would work for my son and his wife. He's been diagnosed bi-polar just in the last few years. It was determined that he's been clinically depressed since he was 15. He's doing good right now, but still has to make a lot of changes to win back the trust of his wife. He's still in Alabama and she's in Illinois with their boys. It's so sad, he was a youth minister for over 15 yerars.