Pushy Relatives...

Not quite sure how to begin this except to say that my Fathers eldest Brothers daughter came to town for 4 days with her boyfriend and his sister also her best friend. They stayed at New York, NY and Thursday she called my home to announce her presence and invite me to go with her to see the Rita Rudner show because her boyfriend hurt his back and didn't feel like sitting that long. I said no thanks...and not much else as I hadn't seen or heard even one word from this person in "50" years. For years I sent Xmas cards, wedding gifts, baby gifts only to be ignored on my special days. No biggy!! When they planned the trip she called my mom for my phone number, wanted my address to stop by but mom knows better than to ever give out my address. I hoped my refusal got rid of the problem but no such luck, she called again and said could I show them around, the things only people who live here know about, the best place to eat for instance. I thought of a million excuses but she wasn't hearing what I said and so I finally did agree to show them my favorite place for lunch, The Neveda Palace, even though I had eaten already. They took the shuttle (free) to guests and we met. I of course didn't even know her and I'm sure she wouldn't have known me either if my brother hadn't sent her a photo on her computer. It was quite ackward, we had nothing even to remaniss about since we were so young back then. They loved the restautant and ate 3 full meals including drinks while I had tea. When the check came, NO ONE reached for it, not her, not his sister and not him, the jerk. Finally we all began to get up to leave, check still sitting there, so I picked it up and went to the Cashiers cage to give her a post dated check since I had very little money and NEVER expected to have a $65.00 check to pay. They drank alot....They called the shuttle and went merrily on their way but not before asking if I lived near by? I ignored the question. My question, finally is 2 part. Should I have just blown her off? Should I have NOT picked up the check? I only did because this place is my special place, a small Casino near my home that I go to 3 or 4 times a week. If they didn't know me I never could have written that post dated check. It seems just because I live in the Entertainment capital of the World, I am expected to be the Las Vegas welcome wagon. Am I being selfish or how would you feel? These people are assholes as far as I'm concerned looking for FREE whatever they can get...sigh! Don't get me wrong I love company and visits from friends but this person is no friend of mine, especially now. I'm looking in the mirror to see where the word "idiot" is written on my face.

I think they should have gotten the check. Sounds like they were looking for a free ride or something. I guess you live and learn. If she ever has the nerve to call again, I guess you'll know what to say.

If it helps any, I had a friend I left behind in AZ when I moved to OH and she expected me to pay her airfare to come see me. Still haven't seen her.

Chatty, that's awful! I hate people who take advantage like that. You should NOT have gotten stuck with the check. They knew exactly what they were doing. You didn't invite them, they invited themselves. My husband and I went to Vegas last June. It was my first time there. If they can't afford to pay for their meals, they have no business going on a trip like that. If they can afford a trip like that, they have a lot of nerve spongeing off relatives, especially ones they don't even acknowledge otherwise. I didn't need anyone to "show me around" either. I think the conceirge at the hotel can answer most questions.

We did have friends who had been recently telling us, "eat here," or "eat there," or "go see this or that show." We had one guy who lives here but owns a house there and is now living there, but he was still here in June. He sat us down one night and told us all the places the locals go so we could eat cheap and not to eat at the hotel. I almost cried. I waited for so long for this trip, I wanted to eat at the Steakhouse at the Bellagio and that's what I did. Gee, I wish someone else had picked up that check

Take them off your card list and if they return to Vegas tell them what happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas and that you'll tell all you're friends on the Internet how cheap they are.
Louisa

Hey Chatty,
I say you turn the tables on 'em. Send them a letter something like:::

Dear cheap relatives,
"The proprietors at the blah, blah restaurant have notified me that they plan to return my check for the meal we shared at their restaurant during your recent visit. The plan is a part of their effort to eliminate the abuse of local residents by slimeball relatives. The restaurant will be resubmitting the bill to you in the amount of $65.00.
Thank you so very much for the lovely meal.
I can hardly wait for your next visit
sincerely,
blah, blah, blah.

Just imagine their faces as they read that. And if you could get some stationery from the restaurant and send them a bill. Whooee!!! You know they would call.
I smell a short story.... Maybe a sit com....

Gee, I am sooo baaaaad!!!

smile

I like Smilinize's idea! Take it one step further though -- tell them you're coming to visit, and ask if they'd rather put you up in their house, or send their charge card # so you can book a plane and hotel. Be sure to emphasize that you're positive they'd want to return the hospitality.

With any luck, you'll NEVER hear from them again.

Chatty,
I think smile and meredith are right on. Send them a bill! That is probably the worst case of being taken advantage of that I've ever heard. (aside from a lot of my husbands customers when we owned our body shop, which is why we no longer own it) People like that make my blood boil.

Family --- the real "F" word!

This is so funny. Chatty, you could make up a Tour Guide for Relatives bill form and charge them for your time. Mention the cost of the meal and put in that amount. I have a feeling these people won't be coming to visit again. If they do, they're brainless.

Oh...if I come to Vegas, will you take me to lunch and pick up the tab? Sounds like a real bargain to me! I need friends like you! But...I do get out that way on occassion and would take you to lunch. It would be a blast and no, Sammie can't come along!

Personally, I think Dotsie should hold the BOOMER WOMEN CONVENTION in Vegas. Then we could ALL take Ms C to lunch. Lord...do I have to do all the thinking around here?

JJ

Friends, all of your ideas were wonderful and after I got over my mad out in the parking lot and watched them drive away, I started to laugh and laugh at the stupidity of the situation. This was one very good lesson for me, I didn't want to meet this cousin or her friends but my dear sainted mother said; "now Char be neighborly." I was, $65.00 worth. NOW for the important part, any of my friends are welcome in Vegas and my home and I would be happy to cook a meal FOR YOU. I don't mind picking up a check ever but (who were these people?) Lord, I'm still laughing about this. I must be a nut case. Guess we all have to learn the hard lessons along with the good ones. Next time I will follow my heart and my head....The welcome wagon is out for my Boomer buddies and you know who you are....ALL OF YOU!