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#121257 - 06/15/07 03:32 AM Re: marriage and family and me [Re: dancer9]
turtle Registered: 06/14/07 Posts: 37	oh yes talked to hubby says it wasn't an affair even going to counseling. He doesn't even get it thinks yu have to have sex to have an affair. I am miserable been married 30 some years. where did you here about it? What can I do. Wrote her things that were so crossing the line. Nothing dirty just affectionate I miss you your my special angel etc. I am so depressed. A depressed turtle. How can you tell it a turtle is depressed? It doesn't come out of its shell. Sad turtle
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#121258 - 06/15/07 04:17 AM Re: marriage and family and me [Re: dancer9]
turtle Registered: 06/14/07 Posts: 37	Dancer9 thanks for understanding-it is painful and he is just not getting it!!!!
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#121259 - 06/15/07 07:03 AM Re: marriage and family and me [Re: turtle]
Edelweiss Member Registered: 06/05/06 Posts: 4136 Loc: American living in Europe	Have you spoken to the "other" woman. I friend of mine did that. She repeatedly asked the "other" women how would she feel if her husband did that to her. They ended up having a long talk, and the "other" woman began to like my friend and promised her she wouldn't keep up any more contact with her Hubby. She kept her word. My friend also threatened to leave her Hubby if he ever contacts the woman again. That helped too.
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#121260 - 06/15/07 03:04 PM Re: marriage and family and me [Re: Edelweiss]
Casey Member Registered: 11/18/05 Posts: 789 Loc: Aptos, California	Is he still having the affair? (and, it is an affair) _________________________ Casey Dawes Wise Woman Shining Supporting women business owners to step into their power as business leaders.
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#121261 - 06/15/07 03:10 PM Re: marriage and family and me [Re: Casey]
Dotsie Founder Registered: 07/09/08 Posts: 23647 Loc: Maryland	Here is a link to an article that lists the Seven Signs of Emotional Cheating. It is definitely considered an affair. Since your hubby spoke with her online, maybe you could email him a few articles about emotional cheating. Just Google it and begin sending him the informaiton so he can get a different perspective on it...something that isn't coming out of your mouth...then maybe he'll believe that what he did was wrong. Just a thought. I'm sorry you are dealing with this after all these years of marriage. Feel free to come here for support. and turtle...take it s l o w... hopefully, time will heal these wounds. _________________________ Founder Emeritus of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women. www.nabbw.com www.boomerwomenspeak.com
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#121262 - 06/15/07 04:20 PM Re: marriage and family and me
Dianne Queen of Shoes Registered: 05/24/04 Posts: 6123 Loc: Arizona	I'm really sorry you're going through this. Betrayal is betrayal, sexual or not. _________________________ If it doesn't feel good, don't do it twice. www.eadv.net Boomer Queen of Shoes
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#121263 - 06/15/07 05:09 PM Re: marriage and family and me [Re: Edelweiss]
turtle Registered: 06/14/07 Posts: 37	I called her up and told her what I felt and she went to my husband and told him "his wife thought they were having an affair". My husband told me that. This woman accepted gifts for her and her child(has a child out of wedlock) and lunches and her child called my husband uncle.
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#121264 - 06/15/07 05:10 PM Re: marriage and family and me
turtle Registered: 06/14/07 Posts: 37	Over 30 years. I live in MD too. My husband changed who I was.
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#121265 - 06/15/07 05:13 PM Re: marriage and family and me [Re: Casey]
turtle Registered: 06/14/07 Posts: 37	He says he doesn't see her anymore but she works in his building. He thinks it is not an affair. What can I do? He totally destroyed who I was and how I feel about him and he just wants to continue and I can't.
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#121266 - 06/15/07 05:19 PM Re: marriage and family and me [Re: Dianne]
turtle Registered: 06/14/07 Posts: 37	I do feel betrayed and want to get even with him. I keep bringing the issue up, look at phone records. I can't control my need to know things. I know its not normal or the right thing. We have been going to counseling and my counselor is 28 and oh forget it I am losing it.
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