Gosh, we are together 24/7 so there ya go!

But there are times he goes to Lowes and I don't. We do NOT do grocery shopping together.....only rarely if I beg and he has nothing to do, which is not often.

Market together.....watch some movies (I'm not a SciFi person). Eat, play Cribbage.

Go see his kids together. Play doggie football with all five dogs.
He gardens, I don't. But I did help shovel the cow manure the other day. (got a fresh load!!)

Anno, it saddens me to read that there aren't many things you can do together these days. I'd say talking is probably the best thing you can do, and touching. Hmmm, sounds good to me. I'm grateful you have such fun memories. Oh, I'd never heard of sexy cooking, but it sure sounds like fun. Wow.

yonuh, I like your comment about being apart and not feeling abandoned. It sounds so healthy. Love it.

Di,how long have you two been together?

I can remember with Chet my second husband he loved talking, the bartender in him I guess, and we just never seemed to run out of things to chat about. I loved that. I think I miss that the most and probably why working on the phones(talking) suits me, plus talking through my fingers here on BWS. Now you can see why Chatty fits me so well as a handle. It's who and what I am.

Will be 13 years this Sept. 26. He's been retired since 2001 so more than half our marriage it's been 24/7 for us. A learning experience to say the least.

Glad to hear about someone enjoying retirement together!

Was it a tough adjustment at first.

Well retiring alone is certainly no fun. I never thought about that when marrying a man nearly twenty years my senior.

chats, you sound like you have fun with your neighbors and people at the pool, but I hear ya. I have a friend who never married, but she does everything with her sisters and friends. She's also the best aunt in town so she also takes her nieces and nephew places. I know it's not the same, but at least she isn't sitting home feeling sorry for herself.

Good for her Dotsie. You are right I have a ball with friends and neighbors at the pools. Plus now I have even more people who want to be members of the 'Pedal Pushers' bike club I started and its growing in leaps and bounds. I don't sit around pining away either but it would be nice to still have my special someone to share all this with in a more personal way.

I have thought about this chatty being a guy 16 yrs. older than I. To me, it's not a terrifying thought. And it may well be because I was solo for a number of years before I met him. I also think over time, it just gets more complicated as women and men become older, it's tough to meet alot of men without their issues of the past or personal idiosyncracies that are not easy to live with on a daily basis.

In all honesty, it would be surprising if I should (most likely I will), outlive my partner, that I could find another guy that I could share passionately and contendedly a life with him. By then, I would worry more if he was healthy enough so that we could even enjoy life together.

There are inherent advantages of starting off with a life partner who is reasonably healthy and can participate positively in mind, spirit and body with some shared activities together before time runs out. I seriously believe that one should not wait until retirement to do some travel which requires some tolerance to weather changes, physical activity and cultural changes. When I am sweating it out snowshoeing in the mountains or on the bike, or just hiking...I think to myself NOW is the time to do this type of stuff when my body feels right and strong.

And not wait around until after retirement.
So that's why living in a condo now, so one can spend the free time (instead of cutting the lawn, house repairs,etc.), so one's vacation can be truly spent travelling, not looking after a house.

I think you're absolutely correct Orchid. When I was a widow with one young son and met Chet who was 44, well established in business and could care for the two of us, and did. I never looked ahead and his death never occurred to me.

I do know now what my relatives meant back then when saying, my God girl, he's as old as your parents. I never equated his age with my parents ages, my parents were OLD and boring, but not Chet, he was handsome, oh so sexy, and far from boring. I saw his age with different eyes than I saw my parents ages.
Does that make sense to anyone besides me?

I know now how lonely it can be and how as you said above, these older men I am meeting have issues of one kind or another, usually health, or grown, jealous children.