It's so funny because I really planned for the empty nest. It's one of the reasons I launched this site and then www.nabbw.com. I thought my nest was going to be empty.

But no more. My daughter's been here for months now. She works part-time and is going to school part-time. She also sees her boyfriend so they are always in and out. I rather like it. We (Ross and I) make sure we have time alone and since she has a lot going on it's so doable.

The other night, just the three of us had dinner at Bahama Breeze. It's was so much fun. Usually her boyfreind is with her, which is fine, but it was nice to have her to ourselves. We laughed a lot.

I'm enjoying having adult children. How about you?

What do you do with your adult kids?

My sons and I went out to eat alot when I moved back here from D.C., in 1990. We went boating and fishing on Lake mead. (I love fishing) and my eldest son David and I frequented some dance clubs where he'd introduce me as his Cougar girlfriend!!! Ah, the good old days...

Yep. Is'nt it great when the nest gets feathered once again? My son and DIL live next door so I get to spend a lot of time with him when DIL is on nights, and with her, when he is on nights. Each come for a sleep over on those occasions. The usual result of a late film on DVD or TV. Those are the only occasions I get to spend time with my son on my own. He's married. He should spend time with his wife and not with me. I spend time with both of them and only singly as above. We go to Church, shop, dine out, see a show, take walks together...and laugh...a lot. Also, they cook, I eat.

I encourage my children to spend more time with each other than with me because then, I'd know they'd be fine and lean on each other when I am gone. I'm happy to babysit while they swan off clubbing.

I love the empty nest.....but, I guess I have it good, because my daughter and her husband bring my grandson over alot or I babysit...Also my son and I have a good relationship, though not as involved. We see each other every week or two. I like them having independent lives. That way their Father and I can rediscover ourselves as a couple..

BlessedOne, welcome. I love your attitude already. You are blessed to have your children in town.

Hi, I'm mom to four...a daughter, and three sons. I'm not an empty nester yet, but given the ages of my kids you'd think I probably am or would be soon. However, I think I'm still several years away from it.The kids range in age between 21 and 30. So here are the the stats: My daughter and her husband have moved in to save for a down payment on a home, my first born son is the only one out of the house. He actually lives in Japan. My second son is finishing college... he took three years off to tour with a band, and the baby went away to college, graduated and is now back home again-unable to find a job in his field.

Enjoyment?

I actually do not mind having young adults home. I enjoy it. It's been fun most of the time; however, when they argue it's on a much larger scale than when they were all little! The square footage of the house has shrunk and private space is minimal. But, I think it's good and I'm grateful we have a roof over our head to share and help out our young adults to launch into adulthood.

What do we/ I do with our adult kids?

We have made it a tradition since the beginning of summer to have a bbq with the family and eat outside every Sunday evening. It's a lot of work; however, under the twilight of the stars it's created an atmosphere whereby some great conversations that are little more meaningful have taken place. I think it'll go a long ways to making some decent memories. Outside of Sunday evenings, we occassionally go out for Mexican food - which we all love and will see a movie together. My middle son, has in the past read some of the books I pick up and read, as a result we engage in some interesting conversations over the books.

Momof4js

LOL! I referred to you earlier as "Momo" and it's only now that it registered as "Mom of 4 js". LOL! Glad you found this thread.

Do your children still occupy the same rooms they did before the periods outside of the family home? My daughter still has her room and the grandchildren use their uncle's room when they're visiting...only as repository for their suitcases as they insist in sleeping in my room.

Hi Lola,

I laughed too when I noted you referred to me as "Momo"- I had to stop and take a second look at my username. Anyway, I can see how you thought that!

The boys have returned to their original bedrooms from their youth (except, of course, the one that's in Japan) and my daughter is living with her husband in a backhouse on our property (my mom lived there until she died). The youngest boy still uses his bedroom; however, he's grown too large for his twin bed so now he sleeps at night in his sister's old bedroom in her full size bed. It's a funny sight to see a 6'4" 215 lb man sleeping under a floral and frilly bedding!

How sweet the grandkids sleep in your room. You are so blessed. Hopefully someday I'll have grandchildren.

Thank you to all for welcoming me. I hope to make some friendships...

Momof4js

(that's mom to Jill, Justin, Jason, Jordan - hence, the "4" J's)

Oh, that's so cute that they're all J's. My Dad was one of ten children and his parents decided to name them alphabetically. The youngest uncle ended up with the J - Jacob.

Is your daughter's room in pink? My daughter is still very much a pink girl and also still have posters of her "boy bands" up. Your son and floral bedding is very much the same sight with my SIL when they come to visit. SIL is also a big man at 18 stones (which translates to 264 lbs.)!

I like how your children are still at home. Except of course for the one in Japan. Do you go to visit?

My daughter stayed home until she got married. My son stayed home until he was able to save for a property, which he is renting out now because he and his wife moved in next door after the wedding. I had my home refurbished into a two-family home as part and parcel of my estate planning.

Hi Lola,

Your dad is one of 10! Jeepers... and to name them alphabetically - how clever! Can you imagine 10 children. That would be a busy life!

No, Jill's room isn't pink - but when she was in college (or was it high school?!) she handpainted a vine with flowers on the wall near the ceiling. Her quilt, which is floral and like the vine is on the double bed that he sleeps in. Of course, her feminine dainty furniture is still there, too. It's just so strange to see her baby brother (hahahaha...) there every morning!

I've never heard of measuring weight by stones... how interesting. Where did you learn that?

No, I haven't gone to Japan to see Justin yet. He typically flies here to see the family once a year and we also Skype. My husband, daughter and her hubby went there though two springs ago. I had just started a new teaching position and I couldn't really leave. The good news is he is coming home for Thanksgiving. I can hardly wait. Have you ever been to Japan?

That's so neat that your son and his wife now live next door to you. I would love it if all my kids stayed nearby when they are married. How do you split/ refurbish your home into two homes? That sounds really neat. How thoughtful of you to consider such an option for your children.

Good talking to you.
Take care.
Momof4js

The funny thing is, my Mom was also one of ten children! My grandparents took literal interpretation to "Go forth and multiply".

Stones is the British standard for measuring mass but, it's use is confined to people's weight. One stone translates to 14.7 lbs.

I've been to Japan a few times, but only in transit to and from the States when I attended school in former British colonies in the Orient as a child. Those were the days when it was more common to see Japanese women in kimonos than western attire and one walked the tarmac for the stairs to board a plane.

In the UK, we are only allowed a maximum of 15% extension to our houses and it must be one employed that would not significantly alter the frontage. So, my house was walled: downstairs from my kitchen to the living room which included three bedrooms and two bathrooms upstairs. My son took the other part of my house which included the family room, utility rooms, the downstairs bedroom and three bedrooms upstairs. The extension and alterations are on his side of the property and they have a side entrance. It took sometime for the postman to get used to their letterbox. I only had to alter my kitchen to include a utility room. We share the garden. Or rather, they tend to it ,along with my elderly friends, whilst I sit and enjoy.

I would have opted to build a granny flat behind my house for when I am older but, I have a restrictive covenant on my property and cannot erect a new building on the land. I also have restrictions on the trees I have so we could really only partition the house. Or pay £20,000 penalty for each tree that gets felled in the process. Apart from estate planning, refurbishing the house was also a security measure. I lived alone and had an attempted break-in. My children thought it would be best if my son rented out his property and moved closer to me.

mom and lola, I've been listening in on your conversation and wanted to join in.

Our daughter who is 22 is livng with us now and probably will be for quite some time. She is in her original room and is trying to take over another room. She's busting out of her room, and I'm trying to contain her to one room. HA. She works part time and is in taking couple classes.

Our oldest lived home and saved for a down payment after college. He now has a home in the city with renters. It seems to be working.

Our youngest is 21 and lives in Brooklyn as a director of photography/camera man. He has an apartment there but freelances and travels most of the time.

I was a stay at home mom and totally loved it. I can't tell you how much I enjoy having the kids around. We see quite a bit of our son in the city. In fact, we're going to help him paint his living room this Sunday, and I'm happy to help. Our youngest we get to see in spurts. He'll work for weeks or months, but when he's off, he loves to be home her in MD, and we love having him around. He's on a 52 day gig and finishes December 7th. HE is coming home that day, meaning here, not Brooklyn, and I coudln't be happier.

I understand the love of family.

mom, happy to have you aboard.

I'm going to start a forum about Thanksgiving.