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#7093 - 03/27/06 06:09 PM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
NewLeaf Offline
Member

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
Boy! sandi, you're a better sport than I am. I'm rethinking a lot of my "firmly held beliefs" right now, trying to either codify them or trash them. I do that occasionally.

I'm not sure if that would draw my husband closer or send him further into la la land. I just don't know, but I applaud your laisse faire attitude(sp??)

My husband is an alcoholic. I guess it would make him happy for me to buy him an expensive bottle of whisky or rum....(hummmmm) [Roll Eyes]

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#7094 - 03/28/06 02:24 AM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
Number5, you're having to sleep on the floor because not only did your husband sell the house right out from under you and is not allowing you to live in HIS new home or enjoy any of the money from the sale of the old one and now he's illegally stolen the furniture leaving you on the floor. Now you're actually thinking of what Christmas gift you might buy him...Might I RESPECTFULLY inquire, what is wrong with this picture??? [Eek!]

[ March 27, 2006, 09:22 PM: Message edited by: chatty lady ]

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#7095 - 03/28/06 11:16 PM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
pepper Offline
Member

Registered: 02/06/06
Posts: 75
Loc: Jupiter, Florida
Hey Sandi

Took your advise.....I am now PEPPER!!!

Karen

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#7096 - 03/29/06 08:55 AM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
NewLeaf Offline
Member

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
LOL, Chatty,

We're in the process of ending our marriage. I called a lawyer today for a consultation to see what I might be entitled to if anything.

I advised him to try Prozac and he said he will think about it. I have a lot of pride and though I wouldn't really buy him a gift, I also don't want anything of his either...I'd rather sleep on the floor than in a bed I acquired from him.

Maybe that doesn't make sense to anyone else and maybe I'm wrong, please correct me if I am, but he can keep all his stuff and cram it up a passage I can't discuss.

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#7097 - 03/29/06 09:09 AM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
Sandi Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/06
Posts: 163
Loc: Jupiter Florida
Number 5, take that money you were thinking of spending on his expensive whiskey and put it in that bank acct you opened. As for him, he just has to help himself. My father was an alcoholic,
my brother took 2 yrs to join AA (today he is a recovering alcoholic for 25 yrs) my other brother was an alcoholic and committed suicide.
Trust me, please...you say your prayers, pray for courage to End this marriage, take what you can, get out...you sound like you've had some life, so you've "been there, done that" and this should be a piece of cake. Or you will continue to be a co-dependent, and that's no where to be. Forget the material things, you need to get out and spend some time healing. God Bless.

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#7098 - 03/29/06 05:00 PM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
NewLeaf Offline
Member

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
Good advice as usual, sandi.

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#7099 - 03/29/06 09:32 PM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
pepper Offline
Member

Registered: 02/06/06
Posts: 75
Loc: Jupiter, Florida
Number 5
I agree with Sandi.....you should also see if they have any co-dependency groups in your area...it is a wonderful place to be when you are trying to move on....I have attended several sessions and I can say, with experience, that you learn about YOU and what YOUR needs are...not want someone else wants you to be or do...
God Bless you in all that you do!!! We have but one life so we should LIVE it!!
Pepper (KC)

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#7100 - 03/29/06 09:38 PM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
All great advice. Stick around Number5 and we will support you in any way we can. It's time to rediscover/redefine yourself at midlife. Think of it as an exciting time of self-discovery! A time for you to blossom. It's all in your perspective...

[ March 29, 2006, 01:39 PM: Message edited by: Dotsie ]

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#7101 - 03/29/06 11:18 PM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
NewLeaf Offline
Member

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
Believe it or not, I've actually been to a couple of co-dependency workshops, all very helpful. It wouldn't hurt to do it again. [Roll Eyes]

I could use the support. It has been a very long time since I've liked myself and had the confidence I used to have.

That's a great idea. I was just trying to get all my plates twirling at the same time before tending to myself. Anyone remember that guy on Ed Sullivan who twirled plates on tall poles? I think of him often when I'm trying to do too much...keep those plates twirling and don't let even one of them fall...

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#7102 - 03/31/06 03:47 AM Re: Really, is looking at porn a form of infidelity?
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Number5, please keep your personal plate in the air. We can't have that one fall now that your grand-daughter is counting on you. How are both of you doing now that the initial storm cloud may be passing a little?

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