A quote a grief share friend gave me help every day.
Don't cry because it's over, Smile because it happened. I hope it helps you also.

Welcome Idybug to the BWS forum. Sorry for your loss and I also understand that we move on and go about our lives but a piece of ourselves die with them. It does get better with time and belief in God and the Angels.

ldybug, thanks for jumping in and sharing. Sorry for your loss. Do you recall doing any specific things in the beginning to help with the healing process. Maybe what you did can help others. We have several widows at BWS.

I did a Hospice grief group and meet 3 other widows my age and stayed busy with them for a year. I also did worked with Hospice. I was luckey enough to have lots of friends that cared and stayed in touch with me and kept me busy. The time alone was terrible, I have learned to live alone and am OK now. At times I thought I was going crazy and learned from my Hospice friends, that they were experencing the same things. It took me a good 4 years to find my place. I have gone back to work and meet someone this year and it has been a good year for me. The man I meet is a widower so we can share a lot of things. We both understand and share lots of things together and neither one of us want to forget our spouses and talk about them often. But we are both ready to move on and start a new life.

Melissa...you were strong to take this first step and share your pain. I will add you to my prayer list. Please continue to come to this forum for support. These women are the "best".

Melissa,

my heart goes out for your pain. I wish I could help more.

Dear Melissa, I too am newly lost. My David diagnosed w lung cancer 3/31, did chemo and radiation and lost his battle 7/9, quite unexpectedly as they mis-staged his cancer. I have found strength, love and caring here and work has kept me sane. My local Hospice Grief Support group meetings have been incredibly helpful, we all share the pain of loss and learn coping techniques from each other and feel our feelings freely and cry openly. It helps me heal and ea. day a bit stronger. I don't believe I will ever be free of the pain and sadness but as someone said, one day you'll awake and the sadness won't be the first thing on your mind. Our husbands want us to live our lives.....till we meet again, I too believe they are just steps ahead of us. I feel Dave's guidance and have begun to dream of him sometimes. Come here for love and stay for the friendship and caring friendships. These women have made a huge difference in my life and will wrap their cyber-arms around you. One day at a time dear.....blessings to you.

Cynthia - cynthy

I so remember your pain. I was so lost and confused and just wanted to be alone. Do all the grief groups you can, be sure to share your feelings. I will miss him forever but have started a new life for myself. It feels good to be me again. It was a long journey to get here but be sure you take the time to grief, it is very important to get through the whole process. At times I felt I had gone back and repeated things I thought I had already dealt with. It took me almost 4 years to reach a point I was ready to move into a new life without him. The journey was long for me but I am glad I took the time. This year I have gone back to work and meet a wonderful man. Life is good again. Good luck to all of you and know you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Melissa,
So sorry for your loss, but I'm glad you found the forum. I lost my husband in Feb of 2004, very suddenly, with no time for goodbyes. I miss him so much some days. It's not unusual to think you've come away from your pain a bit only to fall back into the sadness again. There are bad days and days that are not so bad. Grieving takes as long as it takes. The gals here at BWS have helped me so much and I'm very grateful to them. Come here whenever you need a lift. Just know that you're in our prayers every day.