Thanks so much. My late husband's mother was a McIllduff whose relatives were from Belfast. He was always researching her geneology before he died. I have spent a good portion of my life living up to someone else's standards. First it was parents, then two husbands, and all that time I never really stopped to think about my values, my feelings, my dreams. The poet, Basho, said "With the walls of my house burnt down, I have a better view of the moon". I finally decided to take a good hard look at me, not me as part of a couple, but just me. I like me.