Thanks for all your thoughts.

Casey, we are both 100% American working overseas. My husband is NOT Russian (shudder, god forbid ).

A lot of our issues are definately caused by our current living conditions. Counseling/therapy of any kind is all but unheard of in Russia. So is English. Doesn't exist. The cultural milieu in Moscow is also undoubtedly a part of the issue. This is a pit of debauchery, moral vacancy, degeneration, and general gloom. You would not be surprised that our employment here comes with a lot of lucrative perks because this is definitely considered to be a hardship post. After 4 years I have come to despise Moscow. I really really hate this place. And yes, that probably figures into my discontent as well.

But I think more the issue is that if we're going to live in these isolated foreign places, we need some better glue than what we've got holding us together. Did I say that his libido in our marriage has gone from stud to dud? Did I mention that we had a lot of problems last year when I found craploads of porn in his part of the computer? Did I mention that he even calls me ''mother''?

I am not his mother! Nor do I appreciate the homespun handknitted implications of being a chicken soup kind of gal. I like to think that there is still plenty of fire left in my boiler, but he doesn't seem to see it.

But you are right, I should try harder to appreciate the things that I have always liked about him. Bottom line is though, after all we've been through, I just want to be loved. And no, not like his mother!