Mrs. Madness,

Sorry I haven't been able to continue with what I was writing.

Work is just hectic this week. But I haven't forgotten about you.

And as you can see, there are many wise, compassionate ladies who post on this site. And most of them are very open about their own, personal experiences -- willing to share their stories and how they coped or are coping.

I really get the feeling that you are in the process of grieving the loss of your dreams. That's normal and I think necessary, if we are to grow.

It doesn't mean that you won't have "new" dreams.

A very wise therapist suggested the following "visual," to be used whenever I was feeling overwhelmed with past memories or whenever life was feeling unfair.

Think of a scale of balance. One side is negatitive, one positive.

When life starts piling on so much "negative" that the scale tips in that direction, you have to purposely add good things to the positive side, until the scale is balanced. You won't always achieve perfect "balance," but you will not feel so over-whelmed.

Example: for the time being, stop listening to the old tunes that bring you down. If you like music, choose to listen to songs that trigger hope and other postive feelings. If you like to read, read more. If you like certain foods, eat more of those foods.

Add "actions" to the positive side of your life scale.

I could have explained the scale of balance in better terms, but I'm afraid that I'll time out.

cont.
Emily