Wow, so much going on here. First, Casey and Di, I haven't lived with my ex in the same house for three years. During that time we have stayed in contact and have had sex occasionally up until he moved into his new apartment. That was the final straw for me. My feelings for him finally died. He has closed too many doors for me to open.

I have spent my whole life on a spiritual journey only to find that all the efforts, the mind and soul searching were wasted effort. The journey's end is inevitable nothing I can do to change its outcome ultimately.

I probably know myself better than anyone can know themselves, have come to terms with my shortcomings, have done all I can do to change the things I can and have accepted graciously the things I can't change.

I am a professional at taking nothing and making something special out of it...of taking a bag of garbage and making it useful and pleasant.

Life isn't that complicated that we have to take a sabatical from relationships and bow out for a time of reflection and whatever...we are ALL spiritual beings and will live on eternally even after we die, so looking for our spiritual selves is like looking in a mirror. We are spirit body and mind. No journey to find necessary.