Carolyn, How I wish everyone had something as tangible to grab onto. My friends just lost their 15 year old son to leukemia and the mom asked me if it was "crazy" that she'd lay down on his bed and put her face on his blanket so that she could smell him. I assured her that she wasn't crazy. After 5 years I still go into my parents room, open the closet and try to catch the scent of my father. You are a courageous woman to share you deepest hurts with the rest of us. We've all benefited in some way from your generosity. Hugs and more hugs!!!!Kath