I may have mentioned this before but when I got the courage to leave my abusive husband I read something somewhere. It said give your all, 100% of your all for six months. After that time if nothing has changed, then leave which is what I did.

I do not regret it at all, only if I had to do it again I would be more choosey and marry a better father for my kids as they did and still do suffer. But at the time I just didn't know what I know now.

My parents stayed married and lived their life in misery. For 40 years they had no intimacy. They both told me that. My Dad passed away six months ago. Now my Mom is dating at the age of 81. I told her to go for it as she doesn't have another 50 years. Although I think she should it still feels weird and I don't want to know about it really. Funny thing is if one of my Dad's friends or someone else they know did that she would go on and on about how terrible it was, dating before a year is even up. She can be very judgmental and I try real hard not to be.

Now a days young people are more cautious and so they should be with the divorce rate. I put that down to women being stronger. Also it's common now and women help each other to get through it. Also there are many support groups out there now that there never were in my parents generation. I just wish women would make smarter choices before they marry the guy in the first place. (me included)

The only downside to our culture is that the kids are the ones who suffer. They really get ripped off losing their two parent family. Or which is often the case one of the parents or both move on and create new families and often kids feel like they don't fit in that parents life anymore, especially when they have more kids like my ex did. Now that family is more important to him than his kids from his first family.

Also it is not easy for them to adjust to step parents, girlfriends, boyfriends etc. Some step parents are great, but often they are nightmare, poor kids.
Kate