Hello Expat, and glad you are seeking help here, because it's here, where you will find great advice and understanding women.

After reading your post, the one sentence that really stuck out was,..'wanting to be happy again'. I think that is the key. How often do you laugh together? Do you feel comfy with him, or tense and on guard. Can you be yourself, and just feel good about it?

I think very few people manage to be in a perfect marriage. Although I believe there are a few ladies that are blessed with that in our forum.
I for one, am not in a perfect marriage,…but I have decided to stay.
We do laugh together. We do cuddle and feel comfortable together, and we bond on many things. It might not seem that important, but for me, it's vital. That keeps me in this marriage. If I didn't have those light moments, and my life would be more miserable then happy; … I would leave. If you're miserable; like many of us are in between, and that low feeling doesn't go away…ever ever….., no relief comedy, so to speak…. then you should change the situation.