P.S. (Expat))): Do NOT, I repeat DO NOT try to figure his behavior out.....you will spend all of your time doing that and NEVER be able to understand it. You are living in 2 realities.....he isn't in the one you are in.

you will go crazy trying to figure him out. I know; I spent THIRTY-SIX years trying to understand the ex. Then I got it!! He was/is narcissistic, personality disordered, and I spent all of that time trying to figure his behavior out. No one can do that

So then I disengaged; what a relief to stop thinking about HIM, and making plans to escape the abuse.

We cannot understand them, because we are NOT like them. They aren't feeling the anguish and pain that we are.

Sending Love and Hugs, Alice