Q. Why does the capital have so many one-way streets?
A. So that all the civil servants coming in late won't collide with those going home early.
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CHIP AHOY

I bought the latest computer;
It came completely loaded.
It was guaranteed for 90 days,
But in 30 was outmoded!

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When a snail crossed the road, he was run over by a turtle.
Regaining consciousness in the emergency room, he was asked what caused the accident.
"I really can't remember," the snail replied "You see, it all happened so fast."
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https://www.amazon.com/author/bonnie.mill-lemke
https://kdp.amazon.com/en_US/bookshelf