Then are we saying that all the parents who have posted problems with their adult children here haven't done a good job? I know it's not how I feel. If an adult woman gets pregnant and aborts her child is her upbringing really at fault? If she chooses an unsavory profession or steals or does drugs as an adult is it really her upbringing? Her parents didn't tell her to do it and she likely knows her parents won't approve of her behavior but chooses to do it anyway. I've known several examples of children being raised in loving homes with strong moral values and religion who grew up and became very bad adults. Should the parents be held responsible for the choices these adults make?