This is such a rich topic. Thanks for sharing from the heart.

I think so much of what people say and do in difficult situations has to do with ignorance, and I don't meant that in a bad way. Some of us are green when it comes to certain situations and even though we mean well, we may come across as rude, uncaring, unloving. I think hulan has realized through the years that even though people didn't respond a certain way, at least they responded and tried to show care. Is that right humlan? And even after all these years, I express my sympathy. A dear friend of ours just lost her only son and I am trying to show love and care for my friends. I just hope I'm doing it appropriately, if there is an appropriate way to act.

I can relate to this ignorance in another area of my life. Two of our three children are adopted from Korea. AS they were being raised, people always asked if they were brother and sister. It made me cringe, especially if they were standing right there with me. I typically responded, "Of course they are brother and sister." They didn't realize n their ignorance to be nosy that they were being offensive. I think what some of them meant, but didn't say appropriately was,"Were they sibligns in Korea before you adopted them?"

One funny, ignorant thing I have to share is that after our oldest son arrived at three months, he of course was living with us. When he was beginning to talk, someone who had knkow him since he arrived, asked if when he spoke, would he talk in English? All I could do was laugh! What do people think? They don't always think before speaking. That's the problem.